Crimewatchers.

Here's a story. Let's see if you can relate.

At physical therapy today, I worked up a small, yet noticeable, sweat. Even though I'd taken time to generously apply the "Strong enough for a man, but made for a woman" stuff before leaving the house, I wanted to be absolutely sure that I didn't need to be quarantined or anything.

I've been next to stinky people at gyms... I vowed never to be one of them. So, as casually and discreetly as possible, I wiped my cheek on my shoulder while trying to get a whiff of myself before anyone caught on to what I was doing. Smell test: Passed.

*whew, that was close.*

Then, confident that no one had witnessed this very personal moment, I continued my workout. Less than two minutes later, I absent-mindedly glanced around the room and noticed a small security camera high in the corner of the opposite end of the room. Then, panic.

*omg, is someone watching me? did they catch me sniffing myself? are they laughing uncontrollably in a back office somewhere, making up nicknames for me, like "Pittney Spears" or "Stinky McGee"... oh no, I'm THAT girl.

Ok, so maybe I didn't panic quite that much, but some of those things definitely crossed my mind. I'm sure it's happened to you too, right? You're at the grocery store, picking up a few things on your way home from work, when you realize you only have a few bucks with which to pay. But instead of walking all the way back to the cookie aisle, after sacrificing your dream of gleefully dunking an oreo (or five) into a glass of milk later on that evening, you plant the box on a shelf between some cans of tuna and a bottle of spicy mustard. Laziness? Maybe. Is that such a crime? Well then, lock me up!


What social no-no's are you guilty of committing, and how often do you actually get caught?